New Year

Sitting here thinking I should write something. A year is drawing to a close, and we were together for all of it, Blackheart included, though we didn't totally appreciate its existence. The end of the year still feels bad, though we're slowly working our way through it. I end up thinking of our health issues throughout the year, and the uncertainty in the world, instead of the good things. But there are so many good things. I'm glad about starting streaming this year. It feels like we're finally social in a way we always wanted to be. IT's because of each other that we can be that way, but it's also because of all our friends who've supported us in chatting, encouraging, tuning in, and everything else. Of course, the good creatures of Critter Time are foremost there.

I don't know what's going to happen next year, but more than ever, I'm going to hold onto the people who matter to me. I need to rely on them and to trust them. Whatever your own needs, emotionally and physically, I hope everyone reading can surround themself with the people they need.

If you're reading this, I lived bitch! I'm writing it in the middle of everything happening around the holidays, and my head is swimming all the time. All I can do is trust that we can handle anything together. Love is what saves me always. I feel like I'm finding new reserves of love all the time, and that I'll find more in the future. I'm thankful for everyone who is nice to me, who lets me feel some of that precious "love" they possess. I'm always living in the moment, so I don't know what 2026 is supposed to be, but I aim for it to be good. But right now I just want to rest a bit and get cuddled.

I dunno what to write, really. It's been a good year on a personal level, but I'm not so hard to please. I have the people I love, and everyone else I want to keep a safe distance. I'm happy that I get to be a bit more myself than I ever have before, I think, but I'm also only building that for myself still, a little bit every day. What July says is right, all of it. I agree with all of that. But for me, I think I view the self as another person to keep close. I want independence right now, not from the people I care about, but _for_ them. So that I can be with them and protect them. When we started streaming, we considered having one "form" but we didn't, because we wanted to cultivate and show our individual selves. So, that's how we've continued to do so in 2025. Who knows how we'll develop in the new year?

And I will love everyone even more next year! I would like to be less shy and come out and talk to people sometimes, but I think I'm doing it already! Smooches smooches!